#3 Killer the pitbull

Dear Dog Owner,
I have written this letter to convey my sincere request for resignation as your pet. Please accept my apologies but I must leave. The conditions you make me live in would not be fit for a dung beetle. My leash is shorter than my very own tail and my dog house is smaller than a chihuahua. You feed me soft food from a tuna can! I am a pit bull for goodness sakes!!! We live in Ontario which, as a province, has the worst weather in the country and you make me live outside!!! This isn't exactly a federal offense but you could at least let me in when it's hailing!

Angrily yours, Killer the pit bull

#2 Wii controller

Dear Obese child,
Get off that couch and work soldier! You can't even do a push-up, let alone a double kick-flip on a skateboard! Half the stuff you do in these video games isn't even possible! Get outside and do something already! Ride a real skateboard for once or go for a walk or play a REAL GAME!!! Yes, I know, I'm awesome and I'm totally wireless, but you seriously need to get a life.

Sincerely, Wii Controller

Your Choice, role: Soccer player Audience: Soccer ball Topic: Please get in the back of the net!

Dear Soccer Ball,

Please get in the back of the net! I know you think it hurts when I kick you, but you should really be thankful you're not a rugby ball! They get kicked, thrown, tackled, and punted through mud and other nameless slime that dominates a rugby pitch. Besides, it's not like it's a hard landing! You're either caught by the keeper and land in soft leather gloves or you are get caught in a net like a trapeze artist. In all honesty, you have a pretty good life!

Sincerely, Soccer Player

lets pretend i am a spider. I will try to convince the maid to stop destroying my beautiful webs.

Dear maid,
Please stop destroying my webs. I need a place to live! No one ever goes to the attic and if they do, I promise not to bite them. It is in your best interest to keep me around because I eat flies and other bugs who are more annoying than me.

Sincerely, Spider

Dear H1N1,
We finally got a vaccination for H1N1. That took a while, and when it finally came, all the people had to wait for hours just to get a vaccination for a flu they probably had already had. Then theres the hospital officials and the hockey team who got to cut in line. My friend Hamza got the shot and he doesn't have it yet!

Sincerely, Bentonio :D

Alright, heres some old and new Nintendo games and there prices!

Mario Kart Wii: $60

Super Paper Mario Wii: surprisingly Still 50 bucks

Mario Party 8 Wii: still 50 bucks

Super Smash Bros Brawl Wii: still 50 bucks

Super Mario Galaxy Wii: still 50 bucks

Mario Super Sluggers Wii: still 50 bucks

and Mario Power Tennis Wii with a very unsurprising 30 bucks

Is anyone noticing a trend here? I mean come on guys! Lower the prices already, have a sale or something!!!

And look what they have for the DS and DSi

New Super Mario Bros (as if the old one wasn't enough or something): 40 bucks!

Mario Party DS (how many parties does one Italian plumber need anyway!): 30 bucks!

their newest game Mario and Luigi Bowser's Inside Story: 40 bucks

and here's the kicker, Mario Kart DS a game brought out when Fred Flintstone was still yabadabadooing is 45 bucks!!! worth more than any of them! even the new games!!!!

its all most as if Nintendo has a death wish!!!

Welcome Dudes!!!!!!

Dear Reader!

Hows it going!!! I will be posting insightful and useful information on my Blog! Enjoy!!!